As a mother the most difficult part of my job is watching my child suffer so she can learn her lesson. While I’m the one dishing out the discipline, (taking away privileges) I know the experience is making her wiser. She’s soon to become a teenager and currently shows a little interest in boys. But that’s all soon to change.
She’ll eventually grow up to make her own decisions and make her own mistakes, so I teach her the value of taking responsibility for her own actions. This teaching will come in handy when it comes to relationships. The person she settles with will come from a different family, have a different upbringing and have a different set of values, so she needs to be observant and remain alert when choosing.
I pray for her future husband and teach her to do the same. We’ve led by example and the legacy we leave behind with a loving relationship will hopefully have a positive impact. I’m hoping she’ll grow up to be the kind of woman that makes mindful decisions for her life and future.
I’m no relationship expert but I’m hoping my daughter will take hold of what has taken me a lifetime to learn.
- Treat each other with respect. Do not talk about your partner/spouse behind their back. Your loyalty is to each other. Don’t ignore the friendship.
- Your spouse/partner shouldn’t be totally dependent on you. They need to have their own goals in life, a job, their own interests and enjoy living a healthy lifestyle.
- Nobody has the right to lay a finger on you. Nor do you have the right to be violent with someone else. There is no reason on earth why violence should be accepted in the home. A lack of self esteem can trap women in violent controlling relationships. You are awesome. Get out as fast as you can and don’t go back. You might want to consider pressing charges should this happen to you. It might save another woman’s life.
- Feel secure in your relationship and know that you are loved. You’re fine the way you are and the right person will accept you just as you are.
- You’re worthy of love and happiness. Love isn’t just about giving. It has to be reciprocated.
- Being together is fun. Spending quality time together is even better and a must. Make time for each other, listen always and love with all your heart.
- Your opinion is to be respected. You’re consulted on major decisions and what you have to say is valued.
- The foundation of your relationship is based on mutual love for one another not lust.
- Don’t ignore the sexual intimacy. Keep that healthy but sex must not be the foundation of your relationship.
- Any man who demands more than you’re willing to give to gratify his own sexual desire is not loving you more than his own need. Leave this guy fast! He’s using you like a sex toy. Don’t waste your time. Time is precious and you can’t get it back.
- Looking at members of the opposite sex appreciatively of their beauty is normal, but flirting is not acceptable. This in my books is the same as window shopping.
- Choose the father of your children very carefully. Marriage is a lifelong commitment. Work together to keep the relationship sweet. Get counselling if you need help as a couple. Pray for him. Trust your instinct. It’s your call if you need to bail.