What Women With PMDD Want From Their Men

How to spoil a woman with PMDD? What does she really want?

In a recent poll women with PMDD, were asked to choose what they prefer to receive from their men in a demonstration of love & affection.  Women were able to select more than one item, and were also given the chance to add their own poll items to the list in an attempt to make the poll more genuine.

The question asked in the poll survey was: “Your man wants to spoil you and asks if you like Chocolate or Flowers? What do you choose?”

The first three items added by me (with how they scored) were:

  1. Chocolates – 22
  2. Flowers – 13
  3. All The Above – 7

After the women added:

  1. Whatever comes from the Heart – 5
  2. Massage – 4
  3. Help with housework – 2
  4. Sex – 2
  5. A hand written love letter – 3
  6. A cooked meal – 2
  7. All of the above – 2

More added later:

  1. Champaign – 2
  2. Diamonds – 1

Chocolate is the winner!

Flowers or both flowers & chocolates were selected next, and whatever comes from the heart came in at no. 4 for this group of women.

PMDD or not women just love chocolate.  While it may not be to good for the waistline, it sure makes us feel great!  PMDD women are no exception to that rule.

Why Chocolate?  If anything at all could make us happy during the luteal phase, (WORST PMDD TIME OF THE MONTH) chocolate would be it, as it is known for releasing endorphines and happy hormones.

A great scientific study would be on ‘the impact of chocolate on the PMDD brainif it hasn’t already been done.

The trick guys, is to get to know your woman, understand her and support her because PMDD is no picnic – She’s sick and needs your support as well as your love and affection.  Don’t take her moodswings, nastiness, innability to cope, depresson, rage and all that horrible hormonal stuff she’s putting you through personally, because she’d stop doing it if she could.  So if you’re experiencing that the worst thing you can do is hate her for it and abandon her.

What support means to a woman with PMDD:

  1. Understanding her condition. Read as much as you can about PMDD so that you can empathise. After all you have to live with it too!
  2. Going with her to appointments in order to find something that works so you can both get your quality of life back. She may not be able to fully understand what she needs to do because the condition affects thinking processes.
  3. Take the kids out while mum sleeps.
  4. Don’t press her to go to social engagements because that’s the last thing she needs. She’s in no condition to do it mentally or physically during certain times of the month.
  5. Help her around the house and provide light healthy meals.
  6. Keep tabs on her condition. She might not be able to.
  7. Be her emotional support.
  8. Understand that this illness may be out of her ability to control. You may need to take her to hospital if she becomes suicidal or call your emergency lines.  Australians call 000.
  9. Take good care of yourself.  Get a good amount of sleep, eat well and get regular exercise.

 

chocolate

Cheers!

Sandra

NOTE: For PMDD Support – Join a Closed Facebook Group for Privacy.
There are also groups for those men who live with PMDD.

 

Hardwired To Interact With God & Nature Daily

Reflections on nature and my relationship with God

Relaxation for me is interacting with nature and with God daily.  It is where I also get direction and the most clarity.

Walking the dog recently around local bike tracks unplugged from anything digital woke up my senses to everything around me. I really enjoyed taking in the scenery.

The physical activity was non-strenuous and in my own company, there was time for me to reflect on the word and talk to God.  During that walk I thought about how there’s more to the simple visual pleasure we experience in witnessing creation at its finest.

Seeing the love of God in all that was created often has the effect of bringing me back to the reality of His Majesty and sovereignty over all things.  He has a purpose and a plan for my life, exceedingly better than what I can imagine.

With God, the future is an adventure that I look forward to!

Long country drives to places that I previously haven’t been to are usually met with lush green pastures and beautiful countryside. I crave being surrounded by the green grass; blue sunny skies and to watch waves pounding the shore line.

There’s so much joy in this relationship. I’m convinced that we are hardwired to interact with nature and with God daily.

Visit my page for Christian bloggers to share, like, read & to kindly critique posts at Christian Blog Space on Facebook.

 

How Childhood Trauma Affects Our Mental & Physiological Health Over A Lifetime

The history of Australian Aborigines and Torres Strait Islander children used respecfully as an example.

We can learn a lot about childhood trauma studying Australian Aborigines and Torres Strait Islander history, particularly looking at their treatment at the hands of white colonists.

When the white man came, the dreaming was over, the age of innocence was gone for ever from a people who were very spiritual, relied on family, for whom respect was a way of life, they didn’t wear clothing, hunted for food, had their own methods for farming and had community laws within their own clans. Their life had structure and they were connected to each other and to the land, identifying with it and looking after it.

Aboriginal & Torres Strait Islander Children
Kids from the stolen generation and those kids who witnessed the horrors of seeing family members killed, tortured, raped or brutalised in any way would not have remained the same. Any normally happy child under those circumstances can become angry, develp psychological problems such as depression and anxiety.

The History of Australia – Watch the 4 Part Australians Together Video series to gain a full understanding of the history from the beginning right up to present day.

Diversity, Respect & Dignity
After learning this I started thinking about how easy it is for us to mistreat one another for our own personal gain.  Childhood trauma doesn’t just go away.  Particuarly when discrimination, denial, rascism and all those nasty predjudice attitudes are still around.  We need to stop the ignorance by educating our children within our schools right from kindy about diversity and respect and point out the importance of dignity as a basic human right.  This might even go a long way towards solving the bullying issue most schools have.

TED TALK – How childhood trauma affects health across a lifetime | Nadine Burke


Contact Lifeline 13 11 14 if you are experiencing an emotional or traumatic crisis.
Talk to a counsellor if you struggle with Childhood trauma.  Don’t do it alone. The key to healing is to not bury it. Share your story no matter how bad. There’s no shame.

Forgiveness is an option used widely in the healing process.  It’s a choice or decision we can make that doesn’t let the other person off the hook or deny what happened, but instead allows the hurting person to heal by freeing themselves from the bitter root of resentment and unforgivness.

 

 

 

Cell disorder found in women with PMDD makes them different to women with PMS on a molecular level.

Scientific breakthrough raises questions about chemicals, plastics, food additives and everyday toxins that could be affecting women at a reproductive age.

Scientific research has uncovered that women with PMDD are different on a genetic and molecular level to those with PMS finding that a ‘cellular disorder’ may be the cause. NIH researchers found a sex hormone-sensitive gene complex linked to PreMenstrual Dysphoric Disorder (PMDD).

I’m not a scientist but as a woman with PMDD I now wonder if this condition is caused by a natural abnormality or are genetically modified foods, the use of plastics and toxic chemicals in the air we breath to the food we eat, combined with preservatives and food additives in processed foods modifying our women’s cellular & molecular structure, particuarly those at a reproductive age?  What about alcohol consumption and cigarette smoking?

Science has long experimented with animals finding that toxic chemicals affect the reproductive systems of females, their offspring and future generations.  These new  findings warrant further research.

We all know that the best approach to eating healthy is eating natural and organic.  Simply because of the amount of chemicals in food which includes pestiscides is dangerous to everyone but more so for those who are less tolerant.  Asthmatics come to mind.

The problem is that we live in a fast paced working society with convenience food readily available.  This has become a major industry in western society that was quickly adopted into the culture.

I recommend the following reading for those who have PMDD  to understand how it affects our relationships. Written by a woman who has experienced life with PMDD and the harm it can do to relationships.

Sandra. C.

Born On Mum’s Birthday – Honouring My Mother

On my mother’s birthday I honoured her with this speech before blowing a candle and cutting the cake together. Mum was moved to tears.

Dear Mum

It’s my honour to share a birthday with you. What a special day!

Mum,  the fearless lioness who always protected us.

With your example I learned to fearlessly protect my own.

You loved us without conditions and so we also learned to love without conditions and without fear.

Mum – I worked a little while with you and saw how you worked in the packing factory.

There, I understood the sacrifice you had made and learned to appreciate what you did for us.

Mum– Your efforts were selfless. You kept your 3 daughters clean, combed, dressed and well fed. You worked hard and arrived home shattered every night. But you continued working, cooking and cleaning.

I don’t know how you did it!

You are the driving force behind me wanting to be a good person, the best mother I can be and loving wife.

What a blessing to be able to spend another birthday with you.

I love you mum

Happy 76th Birthday.

In Spanish

QUERIDA MAMA

Siempre fue mi orgullo de cumplir junto contigo.

Para mi es un dia muy especial.

Mama, Sos la leona fiera que siempre nos protejia con todo el alma.

Con ese ejemplo aprendi el valor de protejer lo mio – mis hermanas especialmente……..nadie las podia tocar!  Solo yo.

Nos amaste sin condiciones y asi tambien aprendimos a amar sin condiciones y sin miedo.

Mama – Yo tabaje contigo un tiempito y vi como trabajabas en la fabrica de empaquetar.  Ahi, supe el sacrificio tuyo y aprendi a apreciar lo que hicistes por nosotras y mas cuando  nacio mi hija.

Mama – Tubistes a tus 3 hijas limpias, peinadas, vestidas y bien alimentadas.   Laburaste al lado de papa sacrificando por tu familia y llegabas a casa destrozada pero seguias laburando, cocinando y limpiando.  La casa siempre limpia. No se como lo hacias!

Sos el motivo y la fuerza detraz mio que me lleva a ser buena persona, buena madre y una esposa cariniosa.

Que bendicion de poder pasar otro cumple con mi vieja!

Te amo mama 

Feliz cumpleanos.

Vantage Point – How We Look At Life

Our point of view is our point of reference affecting how we see everything.

Most human beings tend to develop around the society we each live in. Our minds are focused on knowing all we can about life, nature and the world around us. We all want to know who we are, where we came from, how we fit in and what purpose we have for living.

Social rules have changed somewhat from my teen years and they continue to change. One of the many talks my father about the changing world he said, “Sandra, what was right will always be right and what was wrong will always be wrong no matter how trends change.” He was saying in the 80’s that what is in right now doesn’t make it right.

Immediately all the lines which I tested and crossed as a young girl were bought to mind. He said, “We are all born with a measure of right and wrong.  There are no blurred lines.” In that he was absolutely right.

Then he went onto say, “That guilty feeling you feel inside, it’s borne of your character. Listen to your inner voice, trust it and if it feels wrong, then it’s wrong for you.” Yet in all his wisdom in this was where he erred.

There have been plenty of times where I’ve done the wrong thing and it felt absolutely right at the time.  Like taking revenge for instance.  It felt right and it felt GOOD! But, deep down inside I knew it was wrong.  We can’t escape the truth no matter how much we try to justify it.

God gives me a better vantage point than any earthly wisdom.  Each boundary is for my own protection and the lines are never blurred. In Him I trust. Just look at the ten commandments.  Do you know anyone who hasn’t broken one of those?  Yet it’s God’s standard for holiness.  It’s humanly impossible to be good all the time. We live in a fallen world that is broken and unholy.

So how can we ever face a holy God when we are so riddled with sin?  Jesus made a way and it’s in God’s grace through Jesus’ crucifixion and resurrection that we have forgiveness.

Most of all God is stable in all He does and all He is. He is the same yesterday, today and always. His wisdom is eternal and he is a father to the fatherless.

If you’ve never read the bible or you don’t own one and want to learn about Jesus who is known as ‘The Word’, visit The Bible Gateway

 

 

 

 

 

The Perfect Toy For My Child

KIDS TOYS!

There’s nothing quite as wonderful as watching a little one play with toys because as parents we want our children to learn from them, to grow and love life in general and be happy.

When my daughter was a baby, I had the tendency to buy everything in pink. My little girl had pink bedroom, pink clothes and her toys were just about all pink.  It was no surprise that when she could talk she told me that she didn’t like pink.

So I decided to take her out shopping to see which toys really stood out to her.  To my surprise she liked boys toys. There were cars, trucks and even soldiers.  She liked puzzles, magic tricks and some of the more complicated Lego toys.  Her world was much larger than mine and I was learning from her.  I allowed her to explore with different types of educational toys and today my child is no longer little and as a teenager she’s grown up to become quite a bright young lady.

Kids know what they want.  So my suggestion is, show them, let them have some input and you’ll be amazed at their bright little personalities!

Your child’s perfect toy is a safe one for their age group that they’ll play with to keep themselves amused, enjoy and grow from.

By Sandra Ciminelli

Originally posted on: www.cleverideas.com.au